Post Number: 12
|Posted on Friday, 11 December, 2009 - 10:31 am: |
Ok Guys, I heard this a few years ago,PLEASE READ what I say BEFORE YOU PLAY IT.!!
It has some swearing in it, but I think it was pretty funny, if the moderator removes it, I understand, but I think you may find it a laugh, its a RR Joke played on his salesman buy the buyer.
You have been warned, dont take it out on me if you dont find it funny or are offended by the odd swear word.lol
I know us Kiwis found it funny! lol
Post Number: 920
|Posted on Friday, 11 December, 2009 - 11:54 am: |
I will not be deleting this link however it does contain obscene language with the usual expletives.
You have been warned- do not open this link if you are offended by expletives starting with "c" and "f" in particular.
(Message edited by david_gore on 11 December 2009)
Post Number: 64
|Posted on Friday, 11 December, 2009 - 03:52 pm: |
I question whether there is a place on this forum for material of such nature.
Post Number: 393
|Posted on Friday, 11 December, 2009 - 04:39 pm: |
I tend to agree with Brian on this one.
Iím far from being a prude and I did get a laugh from it (even though Iíve heard it many years before), but allowing profanities into the forum (whether humorous or not) has the potential to set a precedent that cannot be undone once it has been established.
I can swear like a trouper with the best of them but I would never allow it to enter a forum of such high regard as this.
By the same token, I do appreciate that Andreí possesses a good sense of humour and I do commend him for it as we all need a laugh now and then, but please keep it clean on these postings.
Merry Christmas and a safe driving New Year to all.
Just for a giggle though, here's a Bentley Sleigh for Santa.
Post Number: 13
|Posted on Friday, 11 December, 2009 - 07:35 pm: |
Yes, I do agree with you Robert, umm maybe we should take it off, it is a pity it has too many swear words in it. Moderator I agree we should remove it, I will try and find other (clean) RR Jokes. Thanks Guys, hopefully I didnt leave to distain in peoples mouths.
ps: love the Bentley Flying Claus III
Post Number: 394
|Posted on Friday, 11 December, 2009 - 09:15 pm: |
Just for the record Andre,
I wasnít offended by it but I can understand that some will be.
Keep looking for R-R humour
Hereís a couple for starters.
Before going to Europe on business, a man drove his Rolls-Royce to a downtown Tel-Aviv bank and went in to ask for an immediate loan of $5,000. The loan officer, taken aback, requested collateral. "Well, then, here are the keys to my Rolls-Royce", the man said.
The loan officer promptly had the car driven into the bank's underground parking for safe keeping, and gave him $5,000.
Two weeks later, the man walked through the bank's doors, and asked to settle up his loan and get his car back. "That will be $5,000 in principal, and $15.40 in interest", the loan officer said. The man wrote out a cheque and started to walk away.
"Wait sir", the loan officer said, "While you were gone, I found out you are a millionaire. Why in the world would you need to borrow $5,000?"
The man smiled. "Where else could I park my Rolls-Royce in Central Tel-Aviv for two weeks and pay only $15.40?"
A fellow driving a SMART pulled up to a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. He rolled down his window and shouted to the driver of the Royce. "Hey, mate, that's a nice car. Have you got a phone in your Rolls? I've got a phone in my SMART!"
The driver of the Rolls-Royce looked over and said snobbishly, "Yes, I have a phone." The driver of the SMART said, "Hey, you also got a fridge in there, too? I've got one in the back seat of my SMART!"
The driver of the Rolls-Royce, much annoyed, says, "Yes, I have a refrigerator." The driver of the SMART said, "That's great! Hey, you got a TV in there? You know, I got a TV in the back seat of my SMART!"
The driver of the Rolls-Royce, quite irritated by now, replied, "Of course, I have a television. A Rolls-Royce is the finest luxury car in the world!" The driver of the SMART said, "Yes, a very nice car! Hey, you got a bed in there? I got a bed in the back of my SMART!"
The driver of the Rolls-Royce upset that he did not have a bed, sped away and went straight to the dealer, where he promptly ordered a bed to be installed in the back of his Rolls-Royce.
The next morning, he returned to pick up his car, and the bed looked superb. It came complete with silk sheets and a brass-trimmed headboard. It was clearly a bed fit for a Rolls-Royce. So the driver of the Royce began searching for the SMART. He drove around all day and finally found the SMART late that night. It was parked, with all the windows fogged up from the inside.
He got out and knocked on the window of the SMART. When there wasn't any answer, he continued knocking and knocking until finally, the owner of the SMART lowered the window, and stuck his soaking wet head out.
"I now have a bed in the back of my Rolls-Royce," the driver stated arrogantly.
The driver of the SMART looked at him narrowly and said, "You got me out of the shower to tell me THIS ?!?!"
Post Number: 12
|Posted on Saturday, 12 December, 2009 - 12:21 pm: |
Love the RR complaint phone call. Sounds like one I made once when we bought a new Ford in NZ ( just before they closed down the factory) The door fell off - seriously - when my wife was picking up the kids from school. I rang the car salesman who told me to drive the car in - imagine the rest.
Post Number: 111
|Posted on Saturday, 12 December, 2009 - 07:20 pm: |
That is a good comedy skit. I love the part about the only good thing in the car was the Japanese radio.
As to it's suitability for this forum, it is only a link and gives a warning. It's about a Royce so I claim it as "on topic".
As to profanity, that is a personal issue. Objectionable to me is violence.
TV stations are chastised for a raunchy but gentle love scene, yet nothing is said about show after show titled like "Murder she Wrote" - or their violent contents.
Okay, the youtube skit refers to things in tailpipes and towing the car with teeth. But that is the extent of the violence. (How could the salesman cope if the car had two tailpipes ?)
Sorry, a nerve has been touched - a nerve very close to home. I'd like the world to concentrate on controlling violence and forget about the 'dangers' of consenting flesh and 'profanity'.
Post Number: 1204
|Posted on Saturday, 12 December, 2009 - 08:25 pm: |
Can I suggest that the object of this forum is to exchange information about the cars. That includes maintaining them, fixing them and using them. And since the forum is 'club based' it is surely appropriate that events and news of relevance and interest regarding our interests also be included.
Cartoons of the cars are enjoyable but they need (in my opinion) to reflect the satire and irony that Rolls-Royce cars attract and deserve. The age of Brockbank and his work in this regard will as likely never be repeated largely because the 'aura' of the name has diminished and no longer commands the attention and emotions of yesteryear.
Today in the digital age images can be conjoured that have never before been thought of. Similarly skits such as recently appeared on this forum can be produced with little equipment and may I say it, little talent. To cite an extreme example, somewhere, there are 15 video tapes titled Rolls-Royce 1, Rolls-Royce 2 etc that involve a bevy of young women who use a very nice Silver Shadow and its various surfaces and accoutrements in ways that no gyneacologist would dream of. I could find these tapes and put them on a website and drop the address into these pages so that readers could view them. To most observers this would do little for the image of our Club, the cars, the contributors or its members!
Richard Treacy has already put some enjoyable 'movies' in our Technical Library http://rrtechnical.info/ which are humorous, relevant and in reasonable taste. If any reader finds them inappropriate let Richard or me know and we will reconsider. Similarly if anyone has material that they believe would fit into this category please let us know.
I am not without sin in this regard myself. A few years back I quoted some material with credits from a very old American volume titled 'Dykes Automobile Encyclopedia'. My post was very smartly deleted by the software which had a provision for deleting offensive words. Our Administrator decided to switch it off given the innocuous word and its context, but that then allows you lot to now pepper the pages with expletives. These do add colour and indeed extent, such as with difficult tasks 'it was a bastard of a job' is not polite but gets the message across.
Over use of such terms however dilutes their effectiveness and I instance the use of the word bloody which some 'English' speakers use like confetti! In short, expletives are the lazy man's solution to a poor vocabulary. Hopefully our contributors can rise to the occasion in this regard and their prose and posting material can be interesting and not offensive to most readers.
Post Number: 109
|Posted on Friday, 18 December, 2009 - 09:47 am: |
"The only thing that works in the ******* thing is the phone ... ". Would that be the phone he's using to call the dealership?
And why is the passenger seat locked in the down position just because he "had a bimbo in it the other day"?
Posted From: 22.214.171.124
|Posted on Saturday, 19 December, 2009 - 02:28 am: |
I am never offended by swear words because I already know them all.
People who are offended are usually offended on some else's behalf
However this is a web site for cars and swearing does offend some so I sway towards keeping it clean
(Message approved by david_gore)