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Vladimir Ivanovich Kirillov
Grand Master
Username: soviet

Post Number: 861
Registered: 2-2013
Posted on Sunday, 22 April, 2018 - 06:09 am:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Errk Jetsetters, the other night on the way home I looked down at the temperature guage on my trusty 1990 XF Falcon Pano (will try to get David Gore to help post the pics of her) to observe it was red bloody hot.

Being nighttime, I was stranded between the black stump and bloody nowhere but I had phone reception so I called my mate with a tilt tray and he scrapped the Pano up and took me the other 170 kilometers home.

The pano had done its waterpump. The seal was not shot but these 250 crossflow engines have a silly plate that goes under the impeller to the back of the water pump so once you pull them off you need to buy a new pump because you cant reseal them to the block. I had resealed this one when I rebuild the engine for her that I found on the local dump three years ago.

So the pano is back on the road now with a new water pump and I even used the Holden Commodore here with a rope to pull the roo bar back into line as I hit an enormous grey kangaroo the other day at 110 kph that moved the bar an entire 12 inches to the left.

But what to do with a beast of a car that people often ask " was that car in that movie Mad Max ? "

Thats simple: Lincolnize it. Ergo, pull 6 cylinder 250 crossflow with 3 speed trimatic auto and insert 460 Lincoln with wild camshaft and intake manifold with NOS mated to 6 speed Tremec. (I already have the pedal box for auto to manual swap)

Then to avoid the rear end exploding, insert 9 inch Ford diff 4:1 ratio with 31 inch splines and beef up the springs.

Now the beauty of this swappo jetsetters is that I will have a van that looks like its falling apart (because it is) that is much faster than a Falcon GTHO Phase 3.

However, when the big blue gang looks under the bonnet/hood, what they will see is an engine that just looks like a standard 351 Cleveland which this model in very rare instances came out with standard.Such being, it will appear to look totally legal. Ho ho ho.

Oh yes chaps it will be a hoot and the Toad will be laughing like he's on good Haight Ashby acid.

But you only live once and considering I have had this van for 12 years and have lived in it for at least 5, left it in a paddock for 2, and trashed it mercilessly throughout NSW and Qld for 10, I think it only fair given that I must have saved $50,000 plus in accomodation to spend $15,000 to revitalize its soul.

It has all the correct markings for a super sleeper - ie holes in the floor, totally stuffed bench seat, two wires hanging out of dash to engage starter motor, much rust around rear windows and the rear doors are held shut by a ratchet strap attached to internal metal inside the roof above the front seat. Also, I once carried a German steel framed piano on its roof as well as so much steel and timber it handled more like a boat than a car. Additionally, the underneath of the entire van looks like its been machinegunned.

Situation perfect, I decided to proceed. So David most honorable moderator please email me on zzzzzcobetzzzzz@yahoo.com and I will email you the pics to post in this post Ta Vladimir
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David Gore
Moderator
Username: david_gore

Post Number: 2866
Registered: 4-2003
Posted on Sunday, 22 April, 2018 - 08:55 am:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Vladimir, in my early working career, I spent some time with Norm Oakey from American Auto Parts in Sydney experimenting with "Hy-Tuf" drive shafts to reduce breakages in their Top Fuel dragster. We were assessing manufacturing this grade under licence from the US patent holder.

From memory, the dragsters were fitted with 32 or 35 spline 9 inch Ford F100 locked differentials. The greater number of splines increased the load bearing capacity of the half shafts to reduce breakage. I also tried AISI H11 tool steel which proved successful in the roller spline differential used in Pete Geoghegan's HJ Monaro Sports Sedan after a very frustrating initial period of breaking half shafts at the start of a race. I suggest your car will benefit from the greater number of splines however this may not be necessary as your tyres will probably break traction long before peak loads on the drive shafts arise.

Have emailed you and will look forward to posting the pictures when you send them.

P.S. I think your panel van might have been fitted with the ubiquitous Australian-spec Borg-Warner type 35 auto transmission. The Trimatic was the GM 3 speed transmission that replaced the early Holden Hydramatic and Powerglide auto trannies for their 6 cylinder models.
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Vladimir Ivanovich Kirillov
Grand Master
Username: soviet

Post Number: 864
Registered: 2-2013
Posted on Sunday, 22 April, 2018 - 10:09 am:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Yes David you are totally correct about the transmission being BW type 35. I have trashed the bugger mercilessly for 10 years and left it in paddock for 2. Have run it low on oil and the bugger still shifts quick on wide open throttle.

Yesterday I put it up to 87 mph no problems.
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David Gore
Moderator
Username: david_gore

Post Number: 2867
Registered: 4-2003
Posted on Sunday, 22 April, 2018 - 03:12 pm:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

WARNING - The following content may upset some readers

Vladimir has forwarded the photos of his "Mad Max" Falcon XF Panel van as promised and here they are:-

1

2

3

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michael vass
Grand Master
Username: mikebentleyturbo2

Post Number: 457
Registered: 7-2015
Posted on Monday, 23 April, 2018 - 05:28 am:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Only one careful owner , all the others were not lol
Mike
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Mark Luft
Prolific User
Username: bentleyman1993

Post Number: 182
Registered: 10-2016
Posted on Tuesday, 24 April, 2018 - 04:49 am:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Vlad, me thinks you need a supercharger sticking up out of the hood/bonnett.
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Vladimir Ivanovich Kirillov
Grand Master
Username: soviet

Post Number: 866
Registered: 2-2013
Posted on Tuesday, 24 April, 2018 - 09:42 am:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Mark as much as I love superchargers that would not be in line with the super sleeper concept and definitely the police would start asking questions the truthful answers of which they would know. It just would not be cricket old boy.

I want the Piano to look from the outside and even under the hood totally standard and completely stuffed.

Indeed the very wide wheels on the rear will be covered by ugly wide mudflaps and the exhaust will be two fold. The first silent as possible through many large restrictive mufflers leading to a discreet single tailpipe and the second straight through duals hidden and as loud as f**k.

So I pull up next to a city Porsche at the lights and leave the scene so fast he thinks his foot is stuck on his brake pedal.

Ah the joys of being a grey headed grandad!
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ross kowalski
Grand Master
Username: cdfpw

Post Number: 764
Registered: 11-2015
Posted on Wednesday, 25 April, 2018 - 10:35 am:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

In America we have the farm truck. Kind of the same idea. Plain on the outside, but a sweet candy filling.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQvcMruyBtM
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Tony Taylor
New User
Username: ajt

Post Number: 7
Registered: 12-2013
Posted on Wednesday, 25 April, 2018 - 11:03 am:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Geez Vlad

Looks like a pretty standard panel-van to me.

The garage could do with a bit of a tidy-up though.

Maybe you could change the D to the Letter 'I' in the rego.

Give the Porsche drivers something to think about as she disappears.

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