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Robert Noel Reddington
Grand Master
Username: bob_uk

Post Number: 912
Registered: 5-2015
Posted on Monday, 28 March, 2016 - 07:45:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

The weather has been wet and windy and 14c. I am actually glad because my sister in law and husband turned up. She spends all day criticising and giving me unwanted diet advice. She must weigh 20 stone. We went out and my wife was wearing loose parallel trousers flat shoes 3/4 length coat and black jumper I wore my brown Harris tweed suit blue shirt and dickie bow, very dapper. She wore a day glow pink mini skirt low cut blouse and red high heels. She looked like a frigging clown. She then says my wife dresses badly. He had cargo shorts on. I was going to take them to dinner. But thought better of it. They probably would have been turned away due to dress. Shame they missed out on a beef wellington. She is 60 and tries to dress like a teenager.

I keep Cadburys cream eggs in the fridge and eat one a day, she ate 6 in one hour. Then ate a big fry up later on. I was eating porridge and she asked if I was short of money? She thinks her 6 month old Kia car is the bees knees. She felt put out when a mate turned up with his Jag V8 S Type, it got worst when she discovered that the big black car in my garage is a Rolls Royce. It's under a dust sheet. Also she asked for Radio 1 in the Jeep. Radio 1 is teenager music and appalling music.

Because of the weather they went home early. Good.
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michael vass
Prolific User
Username: mikebentleyturbo2

Post Number: 109
Registered: 7-2015
Posted on Monday, 28 March, 2016 - 18:41:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Hi Bob
Glad you had a nice easter Sunday .We went to Weston park, classic cars everywhere ,sunshine auto jumbles ,car spares had a great day out ,even went in the arena
Mike
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Robert Noel Reddington
Grand Master
Username: bob_uk

Post Number: 917
Registered: 5-2015
Posted on Tuesday, 29 March, 2016 - 08:47:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

She's gone home thank god. Any more advice from her and she's likely to get punched in the face. She thinks Crohn's can cured by weird diets. If it were that simple us Crohnies would have worked it out over the last 90 years it has been recognised. Despite her sister my wife explaining about Crohn's she still frigging carried on and on. Air head. I have a wet room type bathroom, the shower is a tiled wall the sticks out a bit and no door or curtain. She thought it weird that there's no actual shower cubical and used a 1/2 bottle of shower gel. Why have a shower cubical when the whole room is water proof. He thought am ruled by my wife because I was doing the washing up. My turn. I do even dates my wife does odd dates. The comment that really was stupid was getting Crohn's is a good way to lose weight.

RANT OVER.

Fortunately my other guests aren't that thick. I don't mind guests, I have spare bedrooms and a fully working caravan but I do expect them to turn up with food and bung a fiver for extra electric and gas.

I went with the wife and had my beef Wellington. Lovely. I can't eat a lot at a sitting so the restaurant done me a small portion and gave me a big bit to take home free and they gave me an apple pie with a tub of custard free. None of that French creme angalise it was proper Birds instance custard.

My French spelling and written grammar are bad. My French teacher at school was my uncle so I should be much better. I got away with murder in French lessons I spent the time truant.

And then off to an art gallery. I was particularly taken by a bit of cubist art. It sort of looked 3D but it was definately 2D. The piece is priced at 250 Guineas. A guinea is 1.05p and a stupid pretentious price. 262.50p. Also good copy of sunflowers by Van Gough or Van Go, priced at 25. Nice frame.

Our car shows, Classics by the sea, starts in April. Also biker night on Tuesday. So one dead biker per week extra. It's surprising how many bikers go to these shows with illegal stuff fitted to bikes, they know the event will be policed yet turn up with illegal no plates and exhaust. The car lads aren't so stupid.

I am hoping to show my car this year but due to illness it will have to be towards the end of the season. The finances for the car are available. The major expense is just the tyres. The rest is cosmetic body work 50 for materials and the cars good to go.

By Weston do you mean Weston super mare. I lived in Weston for about six months working in a quarry just outside town. Plant fitter. 1976. Heat wave. I went to see the beach racing in August. Nice place to live. A bit like Bournemouth.
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michael vass
Prolific User
Username: mikebentleyturbo2

Post Number: 112
Registered: 7-2015
Posted on Wednesday, 30 March, 2016 - 05:21:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Hi Bob
Glad your peace is restored.
No sorry meant Weston park Shropshire.
Only been to Weston Super mare once peed it down ,came home lol.
Hope your feeling better
Mike
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Robert Noel Reddington
Grand Master
Username: bob_uk

Post Number: 922
Registered: 5-2015
Posted on Wednesday, 30 March, 2016 - 06:56:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Yep I am fine which is just as well.

Because today is shopping day.
My wife forgot her bank card so we had to go home to get it. The cash machine was empty so we had to find another.
The interior mirror fell off the Jeep.
On the way home we had to take a road works diversion, which had a large pot hole I didn't see.
The rear axle bounced so much that the inertia of the mass of an unnoticed rusty brake pipe caused the rusty pipe to leak.
No rear brakes and spongy pedal.
1.5 to home at 20 mph. Which is just keeping pace with the traffic and using the long big gap method. Bearing in mind the handbrake will lock the rear wheels.

So apart from the above drama I am fine. Tomorrow is another day.

1976 had a heat wave. Weston super mare got a good portion of it. We couldn't work during the day so we started at 4 am till 10 and 6pm to 9 pm. Rest of the time we spent in a made made lake in the quarry.

Most places show their grim side in the rain.
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Geoff Wootton
Grand Master
Username: dounraey

Post Number: 1124
Registered: 5-2012
Posted on Wednesday, 30 March, 2016 - 08:05:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

I remember the 1976 heat wave. What a great summer that was. Prior to it the newspapers had been full of articles about the coming ice age. They even had maps of the glaciers that were due to extend down as far as the Midlands. The 76 heatwave put paid to that particular vision of armageddon. I wonder what they replaced it with.
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Jonas TRACHSEL
Frequent User
Username: jonas_trachsel

Post Number: 82
Registered: 2-2005
Posted on Wednesday, 30 March, 2016 - 16:23:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Quote: I wonder what they replaced it with.
Global warming, arctic ice cap melting, flooding of Pacific islands......
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Vladimir Ivanovich Kirillov
Grand Master
Username: soviet

Post Number: 445
Registered: 2-2013
Posted on Wednesday, 30 March, 2016 - 20:14:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Marvellous rant Bob !!! Nothing like a scruitiniser. But Bob you totally missed your mark. What you do in that type of situation is reach for the large vodka bottle. As you are not a big drinker you tip 90 percent out or into a vessel that can store it for your mates. The other 10 percent you spash over yourself as a form of perfume and you the refill the bottle to 90 percent with water

Bob you must grip the bottle with your life. Ease the obese miniskirted scruitiniser into conversation. When she mentions your drinking you tell her you have it under control and its only your second bottle for the day for medicinal purposes only.

Then Bob you bark like a dog and quack like a duck taking care to slur appropriately like Dudley in Arthur. Then you snap and utter "Thatcher was a cross dresser who had her way with the royal corgi Benjamin and its because fish are deeply involved with KIA export to Pyongyang as KIA is code for the dancing rabbits but without the speed of light colour is not possible. Have you seen my collection of stuffed octopi? Its an art Bob. I would like to explain scruitiser control further but the laptops croaked and this is all via the android but certain you get the picture.
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Robert Noel Reddington
Grand Master
Username: bob_uk

Post Number: 925
Registered: 5-2015
Posted on Thursday, 31 March, 2016 - 06:01:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

After yesterday's shopping drama today was quite peaceful. Making a brake pipe up for the Jeep listening to Radio Two. After wards I rewarded myself with a Cup of coffee and some Jaffe Cakes. Whilst I watched Air Crash Ivestigations on the National Graph channel. Tomorrow I will Road test the brakes. I found that the wheel cylinder was a bit tight so I stripped it down and gave the bits a polish and greased it up with rubber grease and popped it back on the Jeep. The cylinder is 54 so not cheap.

If the Jeep is correct then I am going off to a hide to watch sea birds on the local marshes.

One must not have steam coming out of ones ears when irked by crass people, it's not cricket you know.

Water off a ducks back, zen and I have broad shoulders.

Have you noticed the lastest fashion, really tight jeans that don't fit with a low waste band. 3 steps and you have to pull them up. I saw a fat women wearing these what a mess. I like to sometimes dress very dapper it projects ones persona better. My wife is the same we buy clothes that actually fit properly and of good quality especially shoes. The good stuff always lasts much longer especially shoes. My black oxfords are 10 years old and match my blue suit well. My brown Oxford brogues are 5 years old and both pairs have that shiny comfortable look. Casual wear is ok but even then one must dress sensible not like a frigging clown. Polo shirt and Levi jeans with high waist band and plenty of ball room and black Dr Martins shoes. No jewellery only a watch with white face black hands with a second hand. My watch is a thin silver Avia Quartz. I have some very colourful waist coats, to cover the braces.

Recently I have been training my eyebrows to look like lynxes ears.

Tootle Pip.
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michael vass
Prolific User
Username: mikebentleyturbo2

Post Number: 116
Registered: 7-2015
Posted on Friday, 01 April, 2016 - 19:27:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

Hi Bob
Oh god I'm visiting the in-laws,what Yu pain in the @rse grrr
I even have to pay the petrol to come here grrr
Get me out of here please
Mike
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Robert Noel Reddington
Grand Master
Username: bob_uk

Post Number: 929
Registered: 5-2015
Posted on Saturday, 02 April, 2016 - 06:15:   Edit PostDelete PostView Post/Check IP

I know what you mean just because they are in laws people expect to have something in common. I am afraid that I don't have any in common with my wife sister and husband. Neither of them understand things like the metric system or read books. It say it all, he reads the Sun newspaper, straight to the football. Also since they left I have discovered a broken patio plastic white chair. I don't care about the cost but more concerned that they never said anything thus potentially leaving some one else to find out the hard way that it's broken by sitting on it. The chairs are cheap. A bang on the head may be expensive.

To add to your woes you have to pay for the gas, at least they came to me, saving the gas. But they ate lots.

I said to her that if you eat food because you don't want to see go to waste then you are still wasting the food and overeating. And besides the dog next door will eat it when the dog comes around in the afternoon for a fuss. She didn't really understand what I meant.

I at the moment have my Brother in law staying and the first thing he did was bung me 20 for utilities and had a super market delivery turn up an hour later. He is a diamond. He listens to a lot of blues music. Which I quite like. Where as the sister in law likes what teenagers like and has no musical taste what ever. Today whilst driving to shops we had Howling Wolf Smoke Stack Lightening and then That Spoon. Then Midnight Rambler by the stones. Then when we got home while I was cleaning the Jeep he played some Small Faces stuff and Rod the Mod. Plus he brought a very nice Walnut and coffee cake.